Noisy McNoiserson and the Peace Theives
Do you ever feel like The Grinch? Boy, I realized this week that I do. I was pretty possessive of my inner peace to start with, feeling unsettled as folks slice tidbits away. Not that they were going to use it for themselves. That’s not what happens when you take someone’s peace. You don’t gain peace, you take theirs and you lose your own as well. It’s a sticky wicket. I digress…
This week I have had blessings and lessons starting with the morning of my husband’s outpatient “procedure”. His doctor quipped that it was his early 50th birthday present, no thank you note was necessary. While I waited for him during the procedure in the ambulatory procedure unit bay (which is a collection of gurneys sequestered in each corner of of the room separated only by medical equipment and curtains that don’t quite enclose the entire gurney space. You almost feel you have a bit of privacy, but not quite.)
In the bay with me was a couple a little older than my husband and I. We sat quietly waiting, each of us entertaining ourselves, they with cryptic crosswords in the newspaper and I read. Then they entered. This shuffling mob of a young family. They exuded chaos. As they clambered to the check-in desk, I found myself praying, “Oh, PLEASE direct then to another bay.” Prayers are always heard and answered. This prayer was met with a resounding “No.” And the McNoiserson’s came to roost behind the next curtain.
Mother McNoiserson proclaimed her indifference to the lack of privacy as she grappled her way into the hospital gown. “Dang near everyone in this hospital has seen me naked anyway, I’m not worried about it.” I wondered if I would be allowed to vote on the matter. I didn’t get a vote. Once Mother McNoiserson settled into her gurney the real fun began.
The TV went on loudly for the older McNoiserson daughter and about that time Mother M. discovered that someone posted something ugly about her on Facebook to which she responded by texting very loudly (yes, even her texting was noisy.. Clack, clack, clack-clack clack.. Mumble, mumble. “I’m the map, I’m the map, I’m the map, I’m the map, I’M THE MAP!”). Mr. McNoiserson rises to defend his wife’s honor by promptly calling up a video on YouTube and watching it mindlessly, ignoring everything that was going on behind that very thin curtain. Clack-clack. “I’m the map”. Then the baby, the little Cindy Lou Who of the McNoiserson clan began to cry. I was astounded and now feeling quite cranky. I had skipped coffee that morning because Tim couldn’t have anything, and I didn’t feel that would be fair of me. I was beginning to rethink my conscientiousness. Dr. Seuss said it best, “There’s one thing I hate, all the noise, noise, noise, noise.”